Lessons in Life

I'm not so sure if its my age that's making me feel this way... but I do think that being 25, half a century old and a firm believer that I won't live past 40, I shouldn't be living life the way I am.

I have started work for 2 years in the same old company. I want to accomplish something. I do not want to always be a follower and do whatever people ask me to do. I should have more initiative to push things forward... do more studies on my own and have more ideas. Then I can improve my status in the company and also the way I view my contribution to the company. I think its time I should seriously think of how to contribute.

Apart from work, my personal life also lacks some drive. I'm not doing anything important. Neither am I earnestly learning anything. I guess I am only earnestly spending money. Its kind of frightening to know that despite the huge amount of cash I have to spend every month (its about 2k, mind you), I still overshoot it. It's really really scary. I almost lost track of what I actually bought. When you see the bills coming, I won't be surprised if I actually forgot what I paid for.

Following that frightening self discovery, I made a committment to save up properly. In the July/ August spending period, if I did not remember wrongly, I did not make any huge credit buys besides the Bioskin thingy. Apart from that, I guess it would be perhaps some meals and the RMK stuff and the Shinji Katoh collection which didn't fall into last period's payment. I could be wrong... but I hope I do get to save money this time round. I'm now in the August/ September spending period. So far I have only spent about $100 on a Tangs warehouse sale and have successfully evaded all shopping trips and temptations so far. Good job... and will hold on till month end. Then another 12 days to go!

I think... what I have learnt... is to make an effort to change what I don't like. I'll make more and more effort to make contributions to my job, curb my lousy habit of spending unnecessarily and also live life with a more positive attitude! If I try hard enough, who says I cannot make a difference!!

And I'm on my way to find out my ultimate goal in life. (thanks to my dear friend Kwan Ho who chatted with me on MSN)